| activist judge |
n. A judge who attempts to protect the rights of 'them' (we all know who they are, don't we?) against the god-given tyranny of the 'entitled' (e.g., the Administration or it's donors). (see also, Talking Point #852)
|
|
| alarmist |
n. Any respected scientist who understands the threat of global warming. (see also, Talking Point #621)
|
|
| allies |
n. Foreigners who do what The Administration tells them to do. (see also, british poodle, Talking Point #775, and Coalition of the Economically Coerced) |
|
| alternative energy sources |
n. New (preferably pristine) locations to plunder for oil and gas. (see also, Talking Point #119)
|
|
| balanced |
adj. 1. favoring corporations (ex.: a more balanced approach to the environment.); 2. favoring conservatives (ex.: fair and balanced reporting). (see also, Talking Point #012)
|
|
| bi-partisanship |
n. When conservative Republicans work together with moderate Republicans to pass legislation any self-respecting Democrats would vehemently oppose. (see also, Signing Statements, Legistlative holds, and Talking Point #062)
|
|
| civil liberties |
n. Unnecessary privileges that you aren't afraid of losing unless you are a God-hating, baby-killing, elitist progressive who loves Saddam Hussein more than your own safety. (see also, Talking Point #005)
|
|
| clarify |
v. Repeat the same big lie or straw man over and over again. (see also, Daily Talking Points, and Staying On Message) |
|
| class warfare |
n. 1. Any attempt to raise the minimum wage. 2. Any initiative to actually fund No Child Left Behind. (see also, Talking Point #011 and Project for the New American Century (PNAC) )
|
|
| clean |
adj. The word used to modify any aspect of legislation of the environment by which The Administration allows corporations to pollute, poison, or destroy the subject of the legislation. (e.g., Clean Air Act, Clean Water Act, Clean Internet Act, etc.) |
|
| climate change |
n. 1. Global warming, without the annoying suggestion that something might be amiss; 2. Political Re-Districting (see also, Hurricane Katrina and Talking Point #017)
|
|
| coalition |
n. One or more nations whose leaders have been duped, coerced, or bribed into supporting ill-conceived, unnecessary, under-planned and/or illegal U.S. military hegemony. (see also, british poodle, et al) |
|
| conviction |
n. 1. Making decisions before getting the facts, and refusing to change your mind afterward.; 2. What most members of The Bush Administration will almost certainly be pardoned from between March 2007 and January 2009. (see also, Talking Point #812)
|
|
| culture of life |
n. Any reduction of reproductive freedoms or decision making. (see also, Talking Point #008)
|
|
| death tax |
n. Any form of taxation expressly designed to prevent the continuation of a rightfully and obscenely wealthy aristocracy (e.g., Paris Hilton) from continuing their birthright of wealth and power in America. (see also, Talking Point #907)
|
|
| decider |
[alt. deciderer] n. Karl Rove (see also, 'My Pet Goat' and Hurricane Katrina) |
|
| democracy |
n. Our way or the highway. (see also, Talking Point #009)
|
|
| democrat party, the |
n. Talking Point #127 (See Frank Luntz memo #443 "The perjorative name to be used whenever referring to The Democratic Party"). Always remember that referring to anything democratic in reference to the opposition party may result in immediate 'swift-boating' by The Administration. Never forget, "LOOSE LIPS SINK DictatorSHIPS". |
|
| democratic ally |
n. Any democracy, monarchy, plutocracy, oligarchy or dictatorship--no matter how ruthless--that appears to support this Administration's diplomatic and economic goals. (see also, Joe Lieberman and Muammar al-Qaddafi) |
|
| deregulate |
v. 1. To relentlessly pursue greed, exploitation, usury, environmental destruction, and the elimination of any and all forms of oversight; 2. Constipate (see also, The K Street Project) |
|
| detain |
v. To hold in a secret place, off-shore, without recourse to law, and mistreat in any manner one wishes, until the detainee agrees to repeat anything or confess anything he's told to repeat or confess. (see also, quaint laws) |
|
| economic progress |
n. 1. Recession; 2. Rising unemployment; 3. Minimum-wage freeze; 4. Suspension of the Davis-Bacon Act; 5. Declaration of Martial Law; 6. Any Act of Nature that destroys an entire Democratic stronghold, and makes it available to be plowed under for prestige condominiums, beach houses, marinas, or gaming centers. 7. Eliminating oversight. 8. Out-sourcing American Jobs overseas. 9. A return to the 'dust bowl' days. (see also, Hurricane Katrina) |
|
| economic recovery |
n. When two out of five software engineers who lost their jobs to outsourcing are able to find part-time work at Wal-Mart two years after their unemployment benefits run out. (see also, political re-districting, Hurricane Katrina, and repeal of the death tax). |
|
| election fraud |
n. One man, one vote, with a paper trail to back it up. |
|
| fairer |
adj. Regressive. |
|
| faith |
n. The stubborn belief that God recognizes only radical Religious Conservative moral values despite the preponderance of historical evidence (or rap-sheets, as the case may be) to the contrary. |
|
| faith-based initiative |
n. A complex series of well-hidden and little publicized means of continuing to maintain the votes of the radical Religious Right, through obscene amounts of compensation from The President's little known, unaccountable to Congress, $3.5 Billion 'discretionary' fund. (see also, The Blackwater Group, and Jesus Camp) |
|
| faith community |
n. Radical, chickenhawk Evangelical Christians, because they are 'God's chosen', and to a lesser extent, chickenhawkish conservative Zionists, because they are useful. After all, is not Israel the prophecied bait-on-the-hook just waiting for The Only True God to take that final, Rapture-invoking bite? |
|
| family values |
n. 1. The oppression of women. 2. Bringing 30 - 40 snow-flake babies into the world, while hundreds of thousands continue to die needlessly from cut backs and prohibitions in stem cell research. 3. Bombing legal abortion clinics. 4. Forcing families to keep their long brain-dead loved ones alive against their wishes. 5. Telling 70,000 poor hurricane victims that they're better off peeing on concrete steps in a sports staduim while getting three square meals a day, than what they had before. (see also, Hurricane Katrina, noted humanitarian Barbara Bush, Jesus Camp, Terry Schiavo, Ralph Reed, and Rick Santorum) |
|
| fiscal conservative |
n. A Republican member of Congress who will never--ever--be given a chairmanship on any committee--never! (ex.: "Fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice, . . . . err, . . . . uh, . . . . [crickets chirping] . . . um, . . . you can't be fooled again") |
|
| Fox News |
n. The White House Press Office. (see also, fair and balanced reporting) |
|
| Golden Age Radio |
n. The greatest threat to any modern fascist administration. Properly referred to by neo-conservatives as 'Old Time Radio', or 'OTR', in order to further diminsh or tarnish it's possible appeal. |
|
| growth |
n. 1. The justification for tax cuts for the rich; 2. What happens to deficits when Republicans cut taxes on the rich. (see also, trickle down economics, enuresis, and Hurricane Katrina) |
|
| habeus corpus |
n. One of a family of several 'quaint' legal conventions that can only be traced back to The Magna Carta, and can understandably be ignored with impunity for whatever end The Administration deems appropriate. |
|
| hard work |
n. What The Administration says something is when they forget the subject they were addressing. (ex.: 'it's hard work') |
|
| healthy forests |
n. No tree left behind. |
|
| honesty |
n. Lies told in simple, declarative sentences. (ex.: "Freedom is on the march", or "These tubes could only be used to create a nuclear weapon", or "There's overwhelming evidence that there was a connection between al Qaeda and the Iraqi government." , or "We know for a fact that there are weapons of mass destruction in Iraq" ) |
|
| humble foreign policy |
n. The invasion of any sovereign nation whose leadership The Administration doesn't like. |
|
| humbled |
adj. What The Administration says it is right after a close election and right before commencing to govern in an arrogant manner |
|
| Hurricane Katrina |
n. What The Project for the New American Century (PNAC) should have waited for, instead of allowing 9-11 to proceed as planned. (see also, class warfare, economic progress, helluva job, and econonic recovery) |
|
| insurgent |
n. Any armed or unarmed, violent or non-violent Iraqi on the receiving end of an American rocket blast or bullet spray, irrespective of age, gender, or political or religious affiliation. |
|
| job growth |
n. The increased number of jobs a citizen has to take after losing a previous, high-paying job to outsourcing. (see also, "Y'see that? That's so very American now, isn't it?") |
|
| junk science |
n. Any well grounded, empirically proven, thoroughly peer-reviewed scientific breakthrough, especially where it might affect either the environment, stem cell research, or reproductiive health. |
|
| liberate |
v. steal. (see also, Hurricane Katrina, Katherine Harris, The United States Supreme Court, and Kenneth Blackwell) |
|
| moral values |
n. War mongering, hate mongering, fear mongering, rapture mongering or fascism mongering. |
|
| mandate |
n. What The Administration claims to possess when only 49.7 percent of the voting public loathes it instead of 50.3 percent. (see also vars.:, 'in-the-closet', Karl Rove, Ken Mehlman, and Jeff Gannon) |
|
media, the
(var.: liberal media,
the |
n. Immoral, elitist, progressively-biased traitors who should leave The Radical Religious Right alone so they can complete God's work on Earth. (through influence peddling, bribes, hate mongering, religious discrimination, and declaring war in the name of God)
|
|
| modernize |
v. To do away with, as in 'modernizing Social Security', labor laws, etc. (see also, Hurricane Katrina, and Diebold Voting Machines) |
|
| neo-conservative |
n. Those American citizens divinely anointed to legislate, dictate moral values, govern, and/or prosecute world hegemony, by either patrician birthright, complete abscence of any military service whatsoever (the more evasive, the more prestigious), having been mercilessly picked on during youth, or rightly discovering that they are better than anyone else. (see also, enuresis, chicken hawk, self-hate, victims of child-abuse or neglect, Napoleon Complex, draft-dodger, closeted homosexual, towel-boy, 'wedgie', and high school chess club) |
|
| obstructionist |
n. 1. Any elected representative who dares to question The Administration's Talking Points of the day; 2. Any mother who loses her son to an illegal, unjust war, and dares to ask her Government why. |
|
Office of Faith-Based
Initiatives |
n. The White House ATM for The Radical Christian Right. |
|
| Osama bin Lādin |
n. Rumored to be the Project for the New American Century's highest paid employee. (see also, kidney dialysis, The Carlyle Group, and "Bush Family Fortunes") |
|
| ownership society |
n. A society under which obscenely wealthy donors rightfully take ownership of the rest of 'them'--the great unwashed. (see also, Katherine Harris, trickle-down economics, Paris Hilton, Richard Mellon Scaife, Hurricane Katrina, and Rupert Murdoch) |
|
| philosophy |
n. Any belief or thought that's Anti-Christian, or anti-Republican. |
|
| political capital |
n. 1. What a Republican president receives as the result of a razor-thin margin of victory in an election; 2. Crawford, Texas six months of the year. |
|
| press conference |
n. That rarest of events, wherein the President snickers about his prowess as a leader while simultaneously deflecting difficult questions, or selecting prestigious journalist Jeff Gannon for yet another challenging, insightful question. (see also, easily concealed microreceivers, Karl Rove, and line-of sight digital signal transmission) |
|
| privatize |
v. To plunder and steal National Resources and give them to private business. (see also, Hurricane Katrina). |
|
| public school |
n. An institution of mandatory attendance for all of the lower classes to ensure none of them can ever catch up with 'the rest of us'. (see also, No Child Left Behind) |
|
| reform |
n. The complete and irreversible rollback of every single New Deal reform, law, ideal, standard, and social protection. |
|
| science |
n. 1. Blasphemy. 2. Impure thoughts. |
|
| simplify |
tr. v. To cut the taxes of the wealthiest Republican donors. |
|
| slave |
n. What every neo-conservative is rightfully entitled to own at least 5 of. |
|
| slavery |
n. The neo-conservative answer for acheiving full employment throughout this great nation. |
|
| small business owner |
n. 1. If truly 'small', not the Administration's 'base'; 2. Wal-Mart fodder. |
|
Social Security
reform |
n. Leave No Stock Broker Behind. |
|
| staying the course |
v., The act of being stubborn and unable to admit glaring policy mistakes; being wrong and sticking with the wrong idea regardless of the consequences. |
|
| strict constructionist |
n. Any judge that interprets--however convoluted or tortured--The Law in the Administration's favor, irrespective of it's original intent. |
|
| support the military |
v. To praise The Administration when they send our young, poor and middle -class men and women off to die in an unjustified occupation without proper body armor, weapons, vehicles, or training. |
|
| tax reform |
n. The shifting of the tax burden from unearned income to earned income, or rather, from the wealthy elite to the working class. |
|
| tax simplification |
n. Tax incentives that reward large U.S. corporations for exporting American jobs overseas. |
|
| terrorism |
n. Any act, legal or illegal, that serves to impair the neo-conservative agenda, unless of course, the neo-conservatives engineer it or fund it, or both. (see also, Project for the New American Century or PNAC) |
|
| tort reform |
n. No Victim Left Compensated. |
|
trickle-down
(anything) |
adj. What happens if you don't shake it enough, or when you're just too old to control it any longer. |
|
| unemployment |
n. A condition in which a corporation may gain additional profits and more compensation for their CEO's by several means, including layoffs, 'productivity' increases, pension buyouts, and outsourcing. Outsourcing being the most profitable, due to government kick-backs to corporations for every American job sent overseas. |
|
| uniter |
n. 1. A divider. 2. Anyone who might engage in the deplorable practice of unionizing under-paid, over-worked, employees who are denied health care, safe working conditions, or a discirmination-free working environment in favor of more profits. |
|
Usāmah bin
Muhammad bin
'Awad bin Lādin |
n. Rumored to be the Project for the New American Century's highest paid employee. (see also, Osama Bin Laden, The Carlyle Group, and "Bush Family Fortunes") |
|
| very clear |
adj. Modifier used immediately before any preposterous explanation or rationale. (ex.: "Before I answer that, let me make something very clear. . .") |
|
